… the directions from the package of pre-ground coffee I fell back on because the coffee grinder is about a half a grind away from the grave.*
It makes me sad to use pre-ground coffee. Not so much because of the taste but because the coffee grinder, when it’s working, has a handy slider bar so I can tell it to grind, say, ten cups worth of coffee beans. Admittedly, we grind two cups more than we require because we like our coffee to stand up, but the point is, I put the slider on twelve, push the button (and lean on the top of the hopper because it will no longer grind unless it’s being leaned on) and I get the requisite amount of pre-ground coffee needed to keep myself and my husband from walking into walls or forgetting where we left our kids.
Pre-ground coffee in a package, however, has the clearly printed instructions to use 2 Tablespoons of coffee for each six ounces brewed.
Now, I’m far from being a mathematical genius, but even I know there are eight liquid ounces in a cup. However, to give the coffee package the benefit of the doubt, I pulled out our measuring cup to make sure I hadn’t wandered into an alternate dimension where cups were only six liquid ounces and Spider Man was still Peter Parker.
Nope, still eight ounces in a cup, and Doc Oc is still living in Peter Parker’s body and I’m still stuck guesstimating the amount of pre-ground coffee I need to make a cup of coffee that’s neither brown nut water nor mud.
So to those who print pre-ground coffee package directions (and I’ll toss in the idiots who package hot dog buns) I say Suck It Good Day.
angry coffee mug from etsy.com
*I’m waiting until ToD is called to replace it. It’s just how I roll — and probably an indication of an unhealthy poverty mindset, but that’s another story.
#1 by Jil Maltsberger on January 26, 2013 - 10:42
Awww poor cofee grinder. I know what is with the 6 oz deal, I have never figured that out. Oh well one of the great mystries of the universe I guess.
#2 by Kathy McClure on January 26, 2013 - 13:51
It’s so sad. And loud. And sad.
#3 by jennifer on January 26, 2013 - 13:19
David just spent a bunch of his Christmas money (plus some of mine) on a VERY snazzy new coffee grinder. So I won’t be giving up coffee anytime soon. There’s too much of a financial investment in the grinder. Unfortunately, it’s way too complicated for me to use reliably.
#4 by Kathy McClure on January 26, 2013 - 13:51
Should I ask what kind of grinder? We’re on life support over here!
#5 by Mark James Schryver on January 26, 2013 - 18:46
“Half a grind away from the grave” is the name of my 90s club music cover band.
Also:
* 12 real cups = 96 oz = (96/6) = 16 according-to-the-pkg cups = 32 tbsp of coffee grounds.
* Since a tbsp is 1/2 oz, 32 tbsp = 16 ounces = 2 cups of coffee grounds.
#6 by Kathy McClure on January 26, 2013 - 22:56
*“Half a grind away from the grave” is the name of my 90s club music cover band.* As well it should be.
And I knew if I wrote this, someone would do the math for me. I’m just so proud to know it was you. *HUG*
Of course now I’m trying to remember the car pool conversation we were having where you confessed you wouldn’t be able to sleep at night until you knew the answer to something in that discussion. So I probably won’t be able to sleep tonight trying to remember what that something was.
Which means the least you can do is come out here and measure my coffee.
#7 by Mark James Schryver on January 27, 2013 - 15:49
>>>
Of course now I’m trying [...] what that something was.
>>>
*blink, blink*
And now I won’t sleep for a week.
Who needs coffee, when you have ODC* to keep you up at night?
*ODC: It’s like OCD, except the letters are in alphabetical order, LIKE THEY SHOULD BE.
#8 by Kathy McClure on January 28, 2013 - 12:30
EXACTLY! HAHAHA!
I can’t remember, either. I’ll check with James, he might. I do remember the muffler falling off the car. That was a moment.